My preparation is nearly complete: I have been building up strength in my index finger by moving it back and forth in a horizontal motion countless times daily. I utter “hashtag” aloud whenever possible. When my children ask who I’m…
The wake was beautiful. Fresh flowers littered the temporary dais; a steady stream of mourners came and went, shivering in the garage while filing past the remains. I stood next to my recently departed companion, holding back tears as well-wishers…
Clad in a tuxedo, the young man dotingly eyed my daughter as she walked slowly toward him. When they met, he took her hand while I looked into his eyes and firmly said, “Take care of my little girl.” And…
In spite of my half century on earth, I still relish the chance to master new skills. My children do their best to expand my proficiencies; why, just the other day my 12-year-old taught me how to Photoshop beards…
My Facebook pal Jeannie received the email several weeks ago. A close friend passed away and the service was taking place the following day. Jeannie thought about sending a sympathy card, paying her respects in person, or otherwise reaching out…
It’s nearly four months overdue, but I wish to apologize to all my friends, associates, business acquaintances, and President Obama for what can only be considered a total lack of oversight on my part. I was not aware that November…
A chronology of Jay Leno’s first day as retired Tonight Show host: 3 a.m. Wake up and write down funny President Obama health care joke from dream. Pause. Crumble up paper and go back to bed. 6:30 a.m. Begin preparing list of interview…
I don’t consider myself an equal to Oprah Winfrey. I don’t possess her charisma, her cell phone contact list, or her billions. And I’m okay with that. We can’t all grow up to be talk show hosts, media moguls, and…
Imagine you’re at a party. Someone approaches and engages you in a one-sided conversation. It goes something like this: “Hi (YOUR NAME), haven’t seen you in awhile. Of course, I haven’t seen anybody, considering I just returned from my oceanfront…
This column originally appeared in The Huffington Post 1-8-14 I’d heard rumors about the small, dilapidated single-family structure at the end of my street. During the housing bust it sat vacant, weeds and trash littering the porch and surrounding lot.…