To Speak With God, Press ‘6’
Until recently, I didn’t know it was possible to talk to God via voice prompts. Now I’m not so sure. My religious epiphany occurred in the midst of trying to locate the concierge at the Grand Wailea hotel, a Maui…
Category Featured
If Soccer Parents Ran The World Cup
As the World Cup ambles toward completion, the much-maligned Fédération Internationale de Football Association continues holding its breath in hopes that the “did he or didn’t he/yuck, I guess he did” biting incident involving Uruguayan striker Luis Suarez will go…
It Ain’t Rock and Roll Without a Port-a-Potty
Five dudes in an SUV on a Saturday night, heading to Chicago for a rock music extravaganza. As tunes from satellite radio filled the vehicle’s interior, naturally the conversation turned to concerts. “Last one you attended?” I asked my companions…
Sorry Mila Kunis, But We Are Both Pregnant
A very “with child” Mila Kunis recently showed up on Jimmy Kimmel’s couch to discuss her latest movie and her pregnancy. Soon the conversation took an unexpected, although scripted, turn. Kunis objected when Kimmel, an expectant father, said, “We’re having…
I Can’t Bear to Look at this Father’s Day Gift
Golf Ball Exploritorius – The unexplained and incurable desire to search for other peoples’ lost golf balls in the midst of a round. I’ll admit it; I suffer from this disease, which I just coined. It’s an affliction that has netted…
There’s No T-I-E in a Spelling B-E-E
I have never been a fan of rewriting the rule book when it comes to sports. I wept a little on April 6, 1973 when New York Yankees first basement Ron Blomberg strode to the plate as baseball’s first designated…
The Commencement Speech Jill Abramson Should Have Given
The close of May brings with it so many iconic images: warm temperatures, blooming foliage and a long line of college graduates who stride across stages nationwide to accept diplomas, snap selfies and solemnly move tassels from right to left,…
The Road To Success Goes Through the Salad Bar
My friend Dan and I were discussing the current job market. Like many large corporations that have resumed hiring, Dan’s company has a slew of openings. I asked what he was looking for in the ideal candidate. “I just want…
A Softer, Gentler Way to Whip Mom Into Shape
“Send Mom to the Y this weekend!” I had to read the website’s headline twice, so certain was I that this was some sort of cruel Mother’s Day joke. SEND Mom to the Y? What exactly did Mom do wrong…
Colorado, Think Tchaikovsky Ever Got Stoned?
I applaud the Colorado Symphony Orchestra’s recent decision to promote its music to a younger crowd — and embrace the state’s burgeoning marijuana trade — by playing a series of “cannabis-friendly ” concerts this summer.Other than a bassoonist competing with…