The helpful folks at Google are at it again, determined to automate every daily task so that mankind will one day wake up and immediately go back to bed upon realizing there is nothing for it to do. Having nearly…
Faster than you can say “dropped third strike,” the Chicago Cubs transformed themselves from World Series contenders to “rebuilders.” Or, baseball speak for, “we must get rid of a few guys.” I’m not privy to how many stacks of hundred-dollar…
During the cool fall months, my house is surrounded on all sides by “pumpkin farms” (a polite term for “cash cows”). Parents, admit it: You’ve taken your kids to one. The public pools were drained on Labor Day, yet you…
For most of my adult life I have been searching for that perfect verbal defense. A go-to excuse that, once uttered, abruptly ends the conversation, forcing all divergent parties into silence or, even better, agreement. I discovered it the night…
My 53rd birthday celebration nearly complete, I unwrapped the final package as my wife and daughters looked on. I had asked for only one gift and now there it sat, ready for deployment. The NutriBullet Pro. More than just a…
I waited patiently on hold while my scheduled 9:30 a.m. radio interview became 9:35, then 9:40. Finally, Cincinnati radio host Kathryn Raaker’s producer interrupted the silence. “Kathryn is just finishing up with another guest,” she said. “Then you’re on.” At…
Our nation’s scandals are beginning to sound markedly similar, not in the fallout or the parties involved, but in the suffix attached to them: “Gate.” Let’s see, with football season upon us, the New England Patriots continue to play under…
As the self-appointed spokesman for all dads who recently sent their first born off to college, I have a message for whoever is in charge of university rankings: Please stop. Our kids are now firmly entrenched in their dorm rooms;…
In the spirit of worldwide collaboration, I am imploring McDonald’s to reconsider the “McWhopper” overture. By way of full page ads in The New York Times and Chicago Tribune, Burger King recently floated the idea of merging the ingredients in…
Corporate humorist and author Greg Schwem is so excited to finally have Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos' email address